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Habits for Communicating Across Difference: Listening  [1 of 3]

7/3/2014

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January kicked off with a return visit to UnCollege, the revolutionary gap year program for self-directed learning founded by Thiel Fellow and education changemaker Dale Stephens. UnCollege offers a mentored environment for Fellows to pursue their own learning goals.  As someone who self-designed a "masters" in leadership, ethics and conflict resolution in the School of Life and who designed my own major in college, I appreciate UnCollege's model to advance and legitimize self-directed learning. 
To align with UnCollege's weekly theme of "Habits," the workshop introduced "7 Habits for Communicating Across Difference."  Facilitating the workshop was a delightful opportunity to learn with UnCollege's engaged, curious and highly motivated Fellows. 
The 7 Habits I proposed:
1.  Meditate
2. Listening to Oneself
3. Listening to Understand Layers

4. Know Oneself  
5. Celebrate Differences

6. Speaking in order to be Heard
7. [your own habit]







... What are yours?

Habit 1: Meditate

Goal: Meditate in order to develop awareness of your thoughts 

Skills:
  • To develop awareness of your thoughts and notice when your mind wanders
  • To observe the thoughts (reactions, judgements, ideas) in your mind
  • To concentrate on specific thoughts and to (re)focus your wandering mind
  • To grow your ability to "mind the gap" - the moment between a stimulus and your response 
  • To generate insight, compassionate responses and wise action in the "gap"
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When I learned to meditate and began practicing it daily, I began to be able to hear the noise of my mind.  to notice my reactions that interfered with my ability to actually listen effectively.   My first meditation teacher, Ingen Breen, explained, "with meditation one cultivates the ability to "mind the gap" - the moment between a stimulus and our response to it.  As we deepen our practice, we are able to widen the gap and instead of reacting unconsciously, we gain the ability to respond intentionally."  Once I learned to hear my "noise, I was able to concentrate on filtering it out in order to truly listen to another person. 

When I mention meditation, people often say, "Oh, I can't do that.  My mind goes everywhere." Several meditation teachers have offered the insight that there are many types of meditation; one purpose of meditation is to cultivate awareness of one's thoughts, which doesn't mean to have no thoughts, rather it means to be aware of the mind as it "goes everywhere."  Simply watch the thoughts and come back to one's breath. With that in mind, the workshop began with two minutes of silence following a simple prompt: "Breathing in I am aware I am breathing in, breathing out I am aware I am breathing out. In, Out."  

We ended with a quick debrief about the experience.  
One fellow reflected, "I had to catch my mind from wandering about 20 times." To which, I replied, "Bravo! Most people don't even notice their mind wandering. You noticed it 20 times- that's advanced!" 

Here's a short, fun and practical video introduction on how to meditate for a moment- it even provides a chance to practice for 1 minute. 


Did you catch your mind wandering during the minute of silence? 


from Buddha Station
What other practices do you use to quiet your mind? to develop awareness of your thoughts? 



Habit 2: Listening to Oneself

Goal:  Listen to oneself in order to be able to listen deeply to others
 
Skills:
  • To develop awareness of your inner dialogue (judgments, feelings, needs, interests)
  • To recognize your feelings and needs
  • To acknowledge your feelings and to meet your needs
  • To be prepared to listen to others without your feelings, needs, thoughts getting in the way
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The second habit is what to do with the "noise" that begins when you hear your mind.  I have found the application of the Non Violent Communication (NVC) model effective for self-care.  Applied to oneself*, NVC is a powerful tool for cultivating self awareness and emotional reliance.  

The first step is to distinguish between an observation and judgments.  Our ability to interpret is infinite and often embedded.  Slowing our responses down enough to simply address what is observed (seen/heard) unencumbered by the meaning we attribute to it is a skill that takes practice.  Once we identify what triggered a reaction, we can uncode our response.  We have to learn to strip away the judgments and interpretations to only the objective information, when I see "x" or when I hear "y."  

The next two steps require developing the skills to recognize and unpack one's reaction to triggers.  I didn't know that I had a limited feeling vocabulary until I attended an NVC workshop on race, class and gender.  The instructor read "highly charged" statements aloud and we had to go to stand next to "feeling words" that were scattered around the room.  Even with only the basics of mad, glad, sad, bad and scared, it was a challenging exercise.  So began my journey in emotional language literacy; the feelings list included below under "Read More" helped immensely to grow my emotions vocabulary. 
 
My initial reaction to the step of identifying one's needs was "pfff."  In health professions though our work centers around helping/serving others in great need, the clinical culture often supports denial of one's own needs and often a distain/rejection of 'neediness' expressed by others, except one's patients, of course.  What I hadn't realized until I learned to identify my needs and address them myself was how much I relied on and subconsciously imposed on others to meet my needs. [My apologies all!] Learning this step was empowering and liberating. See the needs list included below under "Read More."

The last step is a request.  When this model is applied to oneself*, one asks how can I meet this need for myself.  I share this NVC framework for self-care and as a tool to develop resilience and empowerment with the ability to acknowledge and meet one's own needs.  

*I share the NVC model with the caveat that, there are cultural values embedded within it. Particularly with regard to the emphasis on "I" statements, which may not translate to cultures grounded in more communitarian concepts of self.  As well, when the NVC model is unskillfully applied on others, it can be quite violent.  Thus, I share this as a tool to be applied only with oneself. 

Habit 3: Listening to Understand Layers

Goal: Listen to understand another

Skills:
  • To learn the 4 parts of listening to understand
  • To know what layers to listen for 
  • To respond to and acknowledge each layer
Listening seemed easy until I actually started to pay attention to it. Then, I discovered, it's an art.  I have learned different techniques for listening, but it wasn't until I started meditating that I became aware of noise in my head that often gets in the way of listening to others (see Habit 1).  Then I learned to quiet my noise with the NVC model (see Habit 2) and fully show up to listen to another person. 

A common element among different listening techniques (active listening, reflective listening, empathic listening) is emphasis that listening is an active verb.  Listening is bi-directional; it requires engagement by both parties.  Listening necessitates more than passively hearing the other person. It is completed by the listener reflecting back what is understood from what has been said.
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I serve as a volunteer mediator for the San Francisco Police Department's Office of Citizen Complaints.  Unlike traditional mediation that results in a contractual agreement, our goal is to foster "understanding", which, at times, can feel unclear as a final outcome.  Understanding does not require agreement on the facts; it means to acknowledge what another person experienced even if your view of the same situation differs. In these mediations sometimes if it hard to know when we've achieved "understanding."  A few years ago, I created this framework: a four part process of Listening to Understand- our goal for that mediation process.  When communication breaks down in any situation, this model may be helpful to check back and acknowledge each of the four steps.  

Now that my mind is quiet, what am I listening for?  

When I listen, I am paying attention to layers.  Just as an iceberg has the visible tip with 80% beneath, so I find it is also with language.  People's stories- narrative, details, facts- reveal only about 20% of what is really going on. To listen effectively, one needs to develop the skills to hear the other 80%.  When you are able to reflect 100% of the "message" back to a person, s/he will feel heard. Interestingly, often, it's less about the 20% that a person says and much more important to reflect the unspoken 80% for a person to feel truly heard.

So, let's give your ears some hooks to grab onto as the stream of words flow at you. 

Listening for Layers

  • Data (details, facts, what happened)

  • Feelings (emotions, verbal and non-verbal cues) 


  • Needs (values, concerns, interests)


  • Identity (core sense of self)
Picture
Original image by Uwe Kils, Wiska Bodo CC-BY-SA-3.0 
via Wikimedia Commons 
First, the data layer- that's what's in plain sight; what a person says, the facts, details. Data focuses on the observation- "what happened" removing judgement and interpretive language as much as possible. Repeating data back may be particularly important for some people to know that you listened, but it is rarely where you will find what needs to be reflected for a person to feel "understood."

The feelings layer surfaces emotions, which may be expressed directly by feeling words; beware, people tend to use the expression "I feel" followed by words that are not emotions. (see feelings list below under "read more"). Often, feelings can be "heard" in other ways.  Tone, pitch, pace may offer clues about someone's emotions.  Body language, including if a person leans forward (engaged) or sits back stiffly with arms folded (closed), may reveal a person's feelings.  

The needs/interests layer surfaces what is really going on.  Here, I am listening for core needs/values. (see needs list below under read more) as well as unspoken concerns and underlying interests.  The negotiation classic Getting to Yes introduced the concept to "focus on interests, not positions." People say they want X (position), but it's because they need Y (interest). There may be other ways to achieve Y, but all they may say is "we want X."  
A classic example of this is Tim and Tory, two siblings, fighting over the last orange in the kitchen.  One parent says, "Stop fighting, we'll split it and you each get half."  Both kids start to cry. The other parent asks why Tim wants the orange? "I need the peel for a cake I'm baking."  Then asks Tory why she wants the orange? "I just got back from soccer and I'm starving."  
When I listen for interests, I am listening past what is said explicitly to understand what the person's real concerns and needs are. When I am not sure, I'll test my assumptions, ask stupid questions, and probe gently to uncover the person's underlying interests.    

Finally, while it may not always come up, when it does, the identity layer is the deep part of the iceberg that could sink the ship, or conversation, in this case. Our identity is the essence of who we are and how we understand ourselves in the world. Addressing someone's identity that may be threatened in a conversation is critical for people to feel understood and safe.  When a person's identity is threatened, they may respond with very strong emotions. Identity may surface as being a good person, a good friend (family: mother/father, daughter/son, brother/sister), a good worker (coworker, employee, boss), a good ____ (doctor, plumber, designer) ... Tip: Identity issues may be triggered around how people to relate to the topics addressed in Habit 5.

Reflecting Understanding

Once you hear layers, you need to reflect back your understanding.  Here are some suggested methods; different techniques that can be applied to each layer.
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Tip for reflecting emotions: It can be jarring to have someone "tell" you how you feel, so I find it's better to use a direct quote, e.g. "You said you feel 'quote word'."  Mirroring the exact emotion word often helps a person to feel heard because we often have subtly different connotations with words. Note: Paraphrasing emotions when repeating back may result in a person feeling not heard. Especially if a paraphrase/reframed emotion word is perceived to diminish its intensity. 

Tip for reflecting values/needs/interests
: It may be helpful to frame it as a question, e.g. "It sounds like Y is really important to you?"  or "I wonder if you need Y? " This extra space allows the other person to determine whether or not, you've heard what they are saying.  

In Action

So, how exactly does this work?   After the workshop, a Fellow came up and said, "I am a developer- really rationale and my mom is really irrational, err, emotional.  I would like to have a better relationship with her but we just aren't able to communicate.  I think that what you presented could really help me- what books should I read to learn more about this?" 

I paused, "That's a great question. But actually, from your participation, I think you have a good handle on the information so I'm skeptical that more knowledge is what you need, I suspect the most important thing you can do is practice. Let's start with an example.  Suppose your mom comes home and finds that no one has emptied the dishwasher and explodes in a highly emotional way.  You can't relate to that intensity of emotion; it's completely irrational and dialogue seems impossible. Is that a fair hypothetical?"  "Sure." 

"OK, so let's start with the tools we discussed when your mom reacts at you in a highly emotional way.  Normally, you would judge it as irrational and dismiss her emotional response.  But now, you've started to meditate and realize that you have a choice in your reaction. [Habit 1]  

You pause your response long enough to listen to what's happening for you. [Habit 2] When you hear your mom speak with extreme emotional intensity and the words: "no one unloaded the dishwasher," how do you feel? ... You can study the feeling list to come up with words.  Let's imagine that you feel scared, because her response seems out of calibration with the situation and your need for congruity and to understand are challenged by the dissonance she's expressed.  Perhaps you feel mad at yourself because you value participating in the household and you want to support your Mom but you didn't notice the dishwasher needed to be emptied... In that moment, you could give yourself support-- as an adult, you know that you are OK even if someone is yelling at you and you know that you are a good son and you do contribute to the household even if you missed this opportunity to pitch in.  Now that you listened to yourself and addressed your needs first, you realize that you are OK, and now you are ready to show up to fully listen to her."

"So, you stop and listen to her by acknowledging what she's saying, 'Mom, no one helped you by putting the dishes away, I can understand that would be really frustrating.' Incidentally, she might look at you in shock if you've never responded this way to her before.  Then you might say, 'How was your day?' or 'How does that make you feel?' 

Remember, you are listening to understand the layers of what is going on for her.  The data that you have is that the dishwasher wasn't emptied, the intense emotional response indicates that this set off something deeper-- is it that she doesn't feel appreciated? Maybe that she doesn't feel supported?  Maybe a stranger was rude to her and she's feeling the compounded effect of disrespect? Look at the needs list (under Read More) and listen to understand what she needs in that moment.  


You want to learn what is the underlying interest behind the dishwasher getting emptied- what does it "signify" to her- chances are it isn't about the dishes. Then you want to acknowledge all the layers so that she feels heard and understood. 'Mom, I understand that you've had a tough day and coming home to find that no one pitched in to help put the dishes away was frustrating.  I guess it might feel like no one supports you around the house, especially that no one noticed or thought to check the dishwasher.'  Then you want to acknowledge whatever the deeper layers are for her that you've uncovered." [Habit 3] 

Most of all, I suggest that you practice this with your colleagues.  Practice the Empathy Poker exercise with people whenever you can.  It's a muscle and you need to build it.  It is best to practice in lower stakes situations so that you are ready in a high stakes encounter, such as family who are the best at triggering us.  These habits are skills and being able to use them artfully is all about practice." 



Practice: Empathy Poker
 To make your own cards, see the Feelings/Needs Lists under Read More below.


Resources/References

1. Peace in Every Step, Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh
2. Wherever you go, there you are, Jon Kabat Zinn
3. Non Violent Communication, Marshall Rosenberg
4. Empathic Listening (Introduced at Steve Rosenberg's Mediation Training)
5. Getting to Yes, Robert Fisher and William Ury. 
6. Difficult Conversations, Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen.


Post 1 [Habit 1, 2, 3]               |      Post 2 [Habit 4, 5]             |       Post 3 [Habit 6, 7]

 


Read More
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Love: Paying Attention to Our Neighbors and the Weakest Among Us

14/2/2014

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This beautiful love story about a math teacher using social network analysis to detect disconnection in the classroom reminded me of my 5th/6th grade French teacher, Madame Maker, who had a fierce, urgent love for us- her students. 

On the first day of class, we learned that the person sitting next to us would be our vocabulary partner.  And to our surprise, our vocabulary grade would be the lower of the pair, because "we have a responsibility to look out for the weakest among us."  Her indignation at poor French grammar rivaled the heated jeers of sports enthusiasts in a tense game.  "Pas DE" echoes in my memory whenever I think of her.  Yet this fierceness was love-- you could see by the same decibel of JOY she shared with each of her students' successes.  When you received 5 As (or 5 consecutive improved grades for those of us who were not straight A students but tried hard), you would get a choice between a homemade strawberry pie or a special chocolate orange from France.  Both were highly coveted rewards, because she was TOUGH. Achievement in Mme Maker's class was REAL success. 

Though feared by many- for me, she was a beloved teacher who cared about us enough to build our character, not only our vocabulary.  Her urgency came from living through WWII as part of the French Resistance in Paris.  She risked her life as a teenager to save the lives of others. Her fierce love was often misunderstood. As privileged children removed from war, we could not imagine what it means to experience social fabric disintegrate.  She had lived through and seen unspeakable horrors yet she inspired us with tales of narrow escapes.  Her name was Peter. (Her parents had wanted a boy. When they discovered she was a girl, they decided to name her Peter anyway.) One day, the Gestapo banged on her door.  "Peter, we know you are in there."  She was terrified- caught finally.  She opened the door.  The Nazi officers pushed her aside, "Where is he? Where is PETER?"  They turned her apartment upside down looking for "him."  Then left admonishing that they knew HE was working with the Resistance and would get him.  So her parents saved her life.  Her stories always showed how "good" can triumph and how the bad included the indifferent.  For her, it was the aggregation of indifference that allowed the unthinkable things to happen in France.  That's why she felt such urgency for us to be better humans in the smallest of our actions.  Mme Maker taught with passion; she embodied the truth that "a heart once touched by love is incapable of cowardice." (Cesare)  Her heroic efforts during WWII modeled courage and continue to inspire me to be vigilant on behalf of the weakest among us.  

Her unorthodox methods and passion, ultimately, got her fired only a few years from retirement.  It was a battle between wealthy parents on the board protecting their sensitive children versus parents protecting rigorous academics and a dedicated teacher under threat of being fired just a few years before retirement.  My first encounter in the school of life that with wealth comes great power and that grown ups do things from self-interest rather than what may be better for the collective.  My parents along with a few others fought the school on her behalf.  They lost the battle. Fearing that I would suffer retaliation due to their antagonistic stance against faculty leaders, I transferred to a new school for 7th/8th grade leaving behind my friends of 6+ years.  The irony is not lost that the teacher who taught me to pay attention to the weakest among us is the person with whom I first learned there can be a human cost of standing with the weak.  Fortunately, my new school was outstanding. New friends came easily.  I discovered my resilience and adaptability.  Most of all, I learned how to use power and privilege to stand with people who are vulnerable.  I would do it again-- and continue to whenever I see an opportunity. 

What the world needs today is courage, may love flow from your every step.  A shout out for all the teachers whose love shapes us!  
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AgilEthics {idea post}

12/3/2012

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After an afternoon visit with the fabulous Game Designer Marigo Raftopoulos, we cross-pollinated ideas at the intersection of games, fun and ethics... and identified this challenge: 



Challenge:  Can we create a fun way for game designers to think about ethics?
 

AIM:

  • To engage game designers in "ethics" 
  • To make "ethics" accessible
  • To make "ethics" fun


METHOD:

  • To make ethics a game
  • To create "ethical equations" (inspired by Chip Conley's Emotional Equations
  • To provide possible "variables" for the equations but to allow users to generate their own variables
  • To design a game that runs like CodeYear of CodeAcademy (one challenge a week) to build your own equation 


FRAMEWORK:

Awareness
Genuine
Integrity
Leadership
Excellence
Trustworthiness
Humility
Interdependence
Collaboration
Service

.... have other ideas for what guiding "principles" might apply? 

MODELS:

  • Chip Conley's Emotional Equations.... what are simple ethical equations that anyone can apply when deciding what to do
  • Create a comic strip to demonstrate how the ETHICS equations apply to a game designer (create 3-4 models)
  • Make a do-it-yourself AgilEthics comic strip toolkit .... Maybe something like (www.drawastickman.com)
  • Agile design: quick testing of ideas and iterative development of one's own ethical equations
..... have other models for us to check out?

APPROACH:

Step 1: Proposed Model Equation + Optional Equation Elements
Step 2: Player Modifies the Equation 
Step 3: Modifications reveal scenarios
Step 4: Player sets Equation
Step 5: Results 
Step 6: Loop back/Follow up for feedback & evolving equations (leave room for second and third thoughts...)
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Hacking Academia [2 of 3]

4/3/2012

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How do we value collectively created knowledge? [FULL] 
                                                              Hacking Attribution [1 of 3]
                                                                                                                                                                     Hacking Working Together  [3 of 3]                                                                                                                                                      
                                                                                                                      
My experience around the academic world, which uses a system of attribution based on a hierarchy of authors and emphasizes the individual, was in sharp contrast to my experience in product design/innovation, which was flat (no hierarchy), team-based collaboration and best idea driven. The academic approach emphasizes individual recognition, which translates into a 'reputation' currency.  This reputation currency operates on name recognition, number of papers as well-ranked author (first, second and last), and "peer review" which necessitates referencing well known names in papers and grant applications to associate oneself with 'reputable' and accepted work.  Reputation based upon these traditional methods of attribution seems to mask the inherently collaborative nature of idea development in the academic context and limits radically new ideas, in part because acceptance depends upon building upon the already established and because if they do not gain traction it lessens one's reputation.  Since people's livelihoods depend upon their reputation currency, they become competitive rather than collaborative or they pursue incremental rather than innovative ideas in order to preserve their reputation.  New tools of technology such as number of times an article is referenced, reader feedback/ranking on merit and open access to publications may crack open the reputation paradigm.

I have wondered, if we could hack academia, how would we build it? The first step would be to make the foundation collaborative and structured to nurture radical innovation and the best ideas.  Last June after Gathering '11, Edward Harran and I began a collaboration to brainstorm what a research lab for the 21st Century would look like, how it would operate and what it would do. One element of what we discussed was how attribution would work for people participating in the research lab. Details of ideas and findings from that project, Macroscope Labs, will be included in future posts.  

My experience in product design/innovation demonstrated the value and radical potential of collaborative idea development.  The factors that I see as different: all participants perspectives are valued equally (everyone has a seat at the table), the focus is on ideas (not egos), the unit of attribution is team (people put their energy toward building the larger unit).  I have wondered whether attribution for papers and grant awards at the department level might remedy some of the challenges of the current academic approach though it would likely stifle inter-institutional and inter-departmental collaboration.  Solve one problem, create another.   It was only while playing the Breakthrough to Cures game sponsored by the Myelin Repair Foundation (MRF) using the Institute for the Future's Foresight Engine Game in the fall of 2010 that I realized how strongly I felt that the current paradigm for research, both corporate and academic, fails innovation in medical research.  During the MRF game round I, I won an award for innovative ideas related to collaboration and wrote a post that highlighted the design thinking approach in round II when I was a game guide. Have a peek inside the game.

What ideas do you have for hacking academia? Strategies for bridging the academic and corporate sectors to advance radical innovation? 


Thought Contributors** Michel Bauwens, Eli Gothill, Edward Harran, Alban Leveau-Vallier, Jay Standish, Jerry Michaelski, Arthur Brock , Eric Harris Braun, Jean Russell, Seb Paquet, Simon Huber, Elleke Landeweer, Graham Leicester, Dominik Wind, Shard Jain, Helene Finidori, Mark Frazier, Mushin Schilling, Daniel Hires, Bobby Fishkin, Lauren Higgins, David Hodgson, Jessica Margolin, participants of the MetaCurrency Collab session, participants of the Breakthrough to Cures game, and I am missing a few people, so pls ping me if I missed you!  This topic jumped to the front of the loopback queue due to a tag on a FB thread that semi-relates to this topic. 

*March blogging sprint: #b03 Day 4: I am participating in a pledge to blog daily during March initiated by Steve Hopkins of the Squiggly Line blog. Follow the daily work of all participants on twitter under #b03 

**Thought Contributors have participated in the evolution of the ideas expressed in this post. I am prototyping a new method of attributing collectively crafted ideas. To learn more, see the post on Hacking Attribution: Thought Contributors.
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Education for Tomorrow

2/3/2012

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A government post reads:

 "Upgrade Education To Meet The Needs Of The 21st Century: Harness new technologies to transform the way teachers teach and students learn. Ensure all public school children are equipped with the necessary science, technology, engineering, and math skills to compete and win in the 21st century economy."

GREAT START .... I would build on it this way:

Upgrade Education to Meet the Needs of the 21st Century:
Harness new technologies to transform the way that teachers learn.
Engineer environments that maximize student learning.
Ensure all children are equipped with the necessary critical thinking, creative problem solving, and collaboration intelligence to excel in the 21st century and to ensure a 22nd Century.

#bo3 [Day 2]
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Learning Journey Tools Requested {idea post}

1/3/2012

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As I begin a series of posts that "report" from an 18 month learning journey, I wonder: are there tools for structuring the output from a learning journey?

Each learning journey seems tailored to the participant(s) and designed for specific purposes.  Wouldn't it be awesome if there were a commons toolbox for designing learning journeyers.  With templates of designs previously used for various purposes that could be recycled, reused and repurposed depending upon one's journey objectives.  This template DIY approach enables an emergent curriculum while integrating robust design that would confer credibility on the learning journey. 

As traditional education is challenged to address a rapidly changing landscape of skills and competencies for 21st Century living and as we see an increasing need to learn and hone new skills/abilities at a rapid pace, the learning journey and alternative curricular approaches are increasing.  I have two friends who are currently fundraising for learning journeys.  Weezie Yancey-Siegel of The Eduventurist Project is fundraising on IndiGoGo and knowmad Edward Harran for Please Help Me Get to San Francisco Pretty Please.  They are both inspiring, passionate social entrepreneurs. 

Here are my experiences with alternative learning and some of the approaches that I took to share my learnings.  

In 2005, I also endeavored on an independent study to deepen my foundation in ethics, conflict resolution and sustainable leadership.  The learning was self-defined, and many of the skills learned were life skills for communication, conflict resolution and leadership yet the tools to assess the learning, competence, fluency with these vital skills was absent.  In 2008, I wrote three papers to accompany talks on the findings and ideas that emerged from that inquiry.  The paper have depth but I did not pursue publishing them in any traditional manner. They are available on my blog: Passive Participation in Conflict, Mind the Gaps and Capacity Building for Inclusive Problem Solving: I + U HALT injustice.

For my recent learning journey, I will write blog posts with the hope that smaller digestible concepts will invite more interaction around the insights and ideas. I may eventually merge the posts together into short topic briefing papers. I have seen others approach independent learning by posting their research proposal, promising to share their reflections and experiences as blog posts along the way, and asking their community to serve as the "dissertation" review board of their blog posts. I opted for offering a reflective, synthesized view of the learnings, but in the moment posts might have yielded more of the discussion and refining of ideas that I have sought.  Perhaps, next time, I'll use a hybrid approach. 

{Idea} Designing a basic toolkit for the self-directed learner could be an invaluable resource.  Design it with corporate HR people who approve the product as credible for a new hire and whose companies would use it for existing employees' professional development for a sustainable revenue source to support a commons toolbox of DIY resources.  

The ideal learning journey toolbox would allow for:
  • self directed curriculum
  • emergent serendipity
  • accountability 
  • credibility/review  
What else would you want to see in it?  What have you used for your learning journeys?  

If you know about resources, please tell me.  I would very much like to have a more rigorous approach to emergent learning!  I have a hunch that I will be taking a deep dive into new subjects every couple of years as a life learner.
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For Our Children to Thrive: Designing Education for Tomorrow's World

28/9/2010

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Our current education system is designed to teach things you need to know, "just in case."  I watch my 13 year old neighbor's eyes dull from studying algebra in summer school just to prepare for the school year.  This is not the spark of enthusiasm or the hunger of curiosity that she exhibits when we talk about ice cream or facebook. Now, one month in with a "tough" teacher, the joy of summer has gone permanently.  The problem sets have no bearing on anything practical. "When will I ever need this?" She asks me pleadingly.  The kids g-chat to complete their assignments (though I introduced them to googleWave and they like that better).  So much missed opportunity, I wonder when will education embrace the future and prepare students with the life skills to manage information just in time?

This paradox reminds me that I took an HTML programming course in Cupertino about 15 years ago.  We sat through a week long course, learning all of the codes to design web pages.  It made one's eyes dull and head hurt, but, I was able to build first generation websites for small businesses- an early web designer.  Fast forward 15 years, the languages have evolved to HTML 5, and what was C has developed onto C++ or CSS, Java has come (and largely gone as I understand it) and Flash, well, it's future is uncertain with portable apple devices unable to read it.  That is to say, a lot has changed. HTML coding is readily accessible on the internet.  So, would I starting now take a class in HTML 1.0 today?  Of course not, that knowledge wouldn't serve me in any practical way.  So, why aren't we upgrading our education system with the same insights to keep up with the times from the bottom up?  

Google is rapidly paving the way to a future in which everyone will have access to the same knowledge and information.  Google is the ultimate leveler of the playing field.  Success and excellence will be redefined.  The meritocracy will be global.  Excellence will be marked by those with the skills to navigate information effectively.   Success will come to those who have the skills to use the information persuasively.  Opportunities will unfold for those with the skills to use information innovatively.  Capacity to communicate and collaborate across geography, language, culture, discipline will be essential.  Social intelligences will exceed knowledge intelligences in value.  The skill of survival will be the ability to access information 'just in time,' manage it effectively, present it persuasively and to work effectively in a collaborative setting.  

How does the current education system prepare our young people for this reality? 

I was thrilled to see a NY Times article on video games in the classroom for middle school children.  Teaching young people skills for the future includes being able to self-assess, set goals, meet goals, adapt...  To thrive in an environment that is not scripted, but rather where you create the opportunities for yourself. 

A few years ago I posted an idea for the UK's first Social Innovation Camp weekend.  The Be Well, Work Well Credentialing Tool was to create a personal development tool using a 360 framework for trainings in soft skills (ethics, communication, negotiation, mediation, leadership).  I added it onto another idea targeted for at-risk young people. We both wanted to build better tools for capturing and improving valuable skills - communication, collaboration, initiative, tenacity- the ones that matter most in life and workplace success.  We wanted to create a system that would allow people to set goals, work at them, evaluate their progress, get feedback, adapt and meet their goals.  (see Health Month a great app that is doing this for healthy living) While performance portfolios are a staple in the work place (Salesforce a dominant player), these tools to support the learning, developing and honing of these vital skills over time have not been adopted into the pipeline.  Imagine a student graduating from college with a portfolio that reflects their soft skills/social intelligence based upon course-work and club activity since high school.  An employer would be able to assess a person's adaptability and capacity to grow. Until tools to meaningfully evaluate soft skills/social intelligences exist, they will be poorly valued.  As access to knowledge gap flattens, these social intelligence skills will rise in value.  Developing better systems to build, hone, and cultivate excellence in them is essential.

How would you design education to allow today's children to thrive tomorrow?
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Interdisciplinary Studies: Structuring Higher Education for the Future

26/9/2010

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Does our education systems need to transform to graduate students who are ready for tomorrow? 

Over the past couple of months, I have heard bright leaders of interdisciplinary centers/programs at top Universities advocate fiercely that what leaders today (and thus, their students) need for success is interdisciplinary education.  This reasonable idea requires "advocates" because it threatens the status quo of traditional academic structures.  A department budget is often based upon the number of students that major in the department. The success of a department may be evaluated by the number of students who go on to get an advanced degree in that discipline.  Interdisciplinary programs make accounting under the traditional system a challenge, and potential casualties of any disruption might include tenure, funding/salaries, departmental size and department status.

Universities have an opportunity to adapt to the rapidly changing world by developing new educational modalities, implementing new approaches to learning, and supporting new programs that will prepare students to lead, excel and thrive.  The public entrusts universities with the task of educating our young people to meet the demands of tomorrow.  Universities have an obligation to look critically at their efforts and to identify structural barriers to empowering students with relevant, applicable knowledge and skills to navigate our complex, dynamic world.   

1) Maximizing the value of an interdisciplinary education
While appreciation for the value of interdisciplinary studies is new, they are not novel. I was an interdisciplinary studies major (Humanistic Area Studies), yes, four quartets ago. Ironically, I would say unequivocally that the process of making my interdisciplinary major happen was the most valuable part of my college education. I learned how to negotiate in the face of a Goliath of unknowns, politics, bureaucracy and resistance.  It was an early success and remains a constant reminder that I can make the seemingly impossible- happen. I apply those skills everyday in my life work as an entrepreneurial social change agent. The lessons of practical experience are invaluable and must be better integrated into whatever new interdisciplinary structure emerges.  Beyond the substance of interdisciplinary problem solving, students need to learn how to apply these ideas in context so that they can concurrently develop the skills to lead and flourish as an interdisciplinary agents of change. (Great example from U of Calgary featured in Tools of Engagement on innovating experiential learning)  The MDG and CGI have galvanized terrific momentum in the SE ecosystem, and we will still have work to do! Our global economy and society will benefit from students having more access to interdisciplinary studies, so yes, let's have more of that, please! 

2) Creating change requires humility and depth
Interdisciplinary programs allow synergistic ideas to emerge and unleash the possibility that stems from bringing multiple views together to create new perspectives.  Yet, interdisciplinary programs need to provide students with depth.  The green MBA and Skoll Scholarships for Social Entrepreneurship MBA  provide students with necessary MBA skills while adding focus, connections, resources to apply these in a novel domain.  Likewise, having a law degree with my Certificate in Alternative Dispute Resolution grounds my negotiation and mediation skills in a concrete actionable framework.  The Certificate in Bioethics & Medical Humanities program that I completed was designed for working clinicians.  Today, many people are graduating with advanced degrees in Bioethics but with no clinical background and they have difficulty getting a job.  In practice environments where the goal is to make and lead change, one needs concrete skills to contribute to the effort.  Stand alone programs run the risk of providing students with great ideas and new perspectives, but without the depth of concrete skills (MBA, JD, MD, Design, Engineering, IT, Art) necessary to catalyze change.  Changing the paradigm of the traditional degree is essential and preparing students with a foundation that affords humility and depth that adds value in at least one arena is critical.   

3) Allowing the dynamic vision of interdisciplinary perspectives to flourish
Interdisciplinary centers bring people from different disciplines together to facilitate dialogue and problem solving.  Open minded people meet, projects emerge and collaborations begin.  Supporting students to find interdisciplinary links is an important opportunity for degree programs.  In the absence of interdisciplinary programs, I had the opportunity to envision my own linkages in the rich, vast sea of humanities. I combined Classical Studies with Latin American Studies- not one that comes to mind on first review, but my thesis was a comparative study of ancient Greek and ancient Mayan mythological views of the underworld and its impact on their world view and approach to living.  Unlike the traditional comparative literature focus of contrasting, I was most interested in the commonalities.  Part of the opportunity of absence of an interdisciplinary program was that it allowed the envisioning of a new perspective- an innovative view.  When the faculty are already there and the interdisciplinary seeds are planted by the courses, I wonder will the opportunities for dynamic vision be accelerated, better channeled, or lost?  

What do you think tomorrow's leaders need? 

This is the first in a series of posts about structure and change in the social enterprise ecosystem.  These are my musings and reflect my views following conversations with people who work in both undergraduate and graduate environments at universities around the world. 
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SE 101: Cool Projects.... Modeling Change: Next Edu Paradigms (5/5)

10/11/2009

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New Educational Paradigms Links on Pearltrees

Education in On my Radar / Social Enterprise: Design, Innovation, Strategy / Mural Institute

"Real learning is the disruptive technology" - IFF Prompt Card


Dynamic Map of Next Education Projects

Important considerations for new paradigm edu:
Occupation of Knowledge TEDxRamallah Munir Fasheh
Schooling the World

Learn about the latest great projects in these two Facebook groups:
Presente (educators looking to bring new/next edu paradigms into the system)
New Educational Paradigms (mostly Gen Y engaging in alternative edu projects)


Programs for changemakers: 
Knowmads, Netherlands
Kaos Pilots, DenmarkMycelium School, USA (see founder Matthew Abrams TEDxNewHaven: 21st Century Education)
Follow a new education activist-in-learning-action: The Eduventurist

Promising Education Initiatives
Transformative Innovation in Education by International Futures Forum
 
TED: 1000 best minds in Technology, Education & Design .... many talks that address issues related to social entrepreneurship
         - See also RSA : Royal Society for the encouragement of Arts, Manufacturers and Commerce (RSA) "a cradle of enlightenment thinking and a force for social progress.  Our approach is multi-disciplinary, politically independent and combines cutting edge research and policy development with practical action"

UNU (United Nations University) OpenCourseWare

Social Edge, supported by Skoll Foundation, by Social Entrepreneurs for Social Entrepreneurs 

World University

last updated 1 Jan 2014
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Minds the Gaps - Scribd

15/3/2008

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This paper is shared under a creative commons license 3.0 Attribution Non-commercial Share Alike. 
Available for download via the link below.

Picture
Personal Reflection 

1. Engaging Change
2. Gaps of Culture
3. Gaps of Geo-Political-Socio-Economics (GPSE)     
4. Gaps of Systems
5. Gaps of Power Perspective
6. Mind the Gaps: Applied to Individual
7. Mind the Gaps: Applied to Institutional/Systems Issue
8. Mind the Gaps: Conclusion


mindthegaps.pdf
File Size: 167 kb
File Type: pdf
Download File

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Mind the Gaps: Applied to an Individual [6 of 8]

7/3/2008

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Mind the Gaps [whole document ]
Mind the Gaps Applied: Institution/Systems  [7 of 8]
Gaps of Power Perspective  [5 of 8]
III. Mind the Gaps: Applied

The following two scenarios reflect the application of how one might apply Mind the Gaps to promote inclusive action.  The first scenario shows an administrator using the Mind the Gaps framework to consider how to address a conflict at the school.  The second scenario demonstrates how a proposed government action was evaluated under the Mind the Gaps framework and illustrates the responsive action that sought to promote conscious, inclusive action for social change.


A.  Individual
As the principal of the private school where a bullying incident occurred, Mrs. M considers how a response to the situation might be most inclusive. 


1. Gaps of Culture


Mrs. M questions how the approach to handling the situation would appear to someone who felt uncertain about the school’s commitment to the girls’ education.  She wonders whether the private school status might make a student or parent uncertain about whether the discipline was based on wealth or on culpability.

She decides to call all the families into meet with each other and the administrators. She considers that this approach fosters the kind of open communication that the school advocates.  She wonders whether the parents may feel a perception of partiality since she has a conflict in complete neutrality for economic reasons, and she decides to hire a neutral mediator who can facilitate the conversation.  She considers that a mediator has the ability to foster dialogue and understanding and the practice of mediation/facilitation is generally accepted across communities.  To be certain, she asks all sets of parents whether they are comfortable with having a mediator present to facilitate the dialogue. 

She doesn’t consider that the remaining parents may have concerns about the situation, nor does she consider that the other students not directly affected may have residual concerns arising from this event. 


2. Gaps of GPSE

Mrs. M does not recognize any geographic considerations in this case, but there are political concerns.  Mrs. M recognizes that the two sets of parents involved between the instigator and the victim have vastly different political outlooks, social status, and wealth.  The instigator’s parents are wealthy, prominent business people with a lengthy lineage of family who have graduated from the school; the victim’s parents work in the public health and government, and both parents are second generation immigrants of comfortable means but limited wealth.  She wonders how to create a more level playing field for the conversation, and decides that it will be the work of the mediator to balance these disparities.

She does not consider that the two sets of parents come from vastly different backgrounds may have different experiences of justice in their personal history, nor that they might have different understandings of the cause of the situation and diverse needs to have a sense of justice achieved.  She does not consider that other students may identify with qualities of the victim and in turn from empathic identification they may experience a sense of ongoing fear from this event.


3. Gaps of Systems

Mrs. M was aware that her approach to this situation was dependent upon trust in the school’s handling of difficult situations as well as in trust in the mediation process.  She recognized the potential mistrust of the school’s commitment to discipline arising from the need for funding as well as the mission to educate its students.  To promote a sense of confidence in the school’s commitment to neutrality, Mrs. M chose to use a mediator. 

To inspire confidence for the handling of this situation, Mrs. M decided to work with a coalition of teachers, parents, and students to identify and develop a way to handle a future incident with consistency and transparent, while retaining flexibility. 

Mrs. M did not consider whether the victim’s parents who have a health background are familiar with mediation and whether they would be comfortable with mediation.  Mrs. M does not check to see whether the mediator has experience with multi-cultural conflicts and does not consider what qualifications the mediator might need to have to establish legitimacy with the parents.


4. Gaps of Power Perspective

Mrs. M reflects on her power in this situation and sees that while she has authority at school, she does not have authority over the parents and in many ways, she is accountable to the parents.  She considers that by inviting a mediator to facilitate the conversation she will enable the removal of any power conflicts that she might hold in this situation.

Mrs. M did not consider that her position could be perceived differently between the two parents.  While the instigator’s parents who are wealthy patrons of the school feel comfortable expressing their perspective and needs, the victim’s parents who do not have a strong economic relationship with the school do not feel equally entitled to ensure that their perspective is understood and their concerns are met.  She also does not consider that the victim’s parents are concerned about their relationship with the school and ensuring that their daughter will not have a difficult time, whereas the instigator’s parents do not even consider that stating their thoughts would have any implication on their daughter’s educational experience at the school.   These are difference arising out of the parents different power positions and the perspective of their privileges.  Mrs. M is not aware of her own privileged perspective and thus, is not able to be sensitive to the ways that privilege informs actions.

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PPiC Framework Applied [4 of 12] 

5/2/2008

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Passive Participation in Conflict submit to War, Reconciliation and Healing [Main Post with PDF]
Framework to Identify Passive Participants in Conflict (PPiC) [3 of 12]
Strategies for Healing and Transforming Experience: Self Hate  [5 of 12]
B.  PPiC Framework Applied

 At a private elementary school in New York City[1], an 8th grade girl, Amanda, decides that she doesn’t like Julia, a small, studious, kind 5th grade girl, because Julia reminded Amanda, “we’re not supposed to go up on the stage without a teacher” when Amanda was going up on the stage one day. Amanda tells Penny “Julia is such a goody-goody, she’s annoying, let’s teach her a lesson. Tell Julia to meet you behind the library at recess.”  Amanda brings duct tape from home and when Julia comes behind the library, Amanda grabs Julia and tapes Julia’s hands together.  Terrified, Julia complies with everything they say. When they hear someone coming, Amanda and Penny pull Julia into a nearby alcove and discuss whether to tape Julia’s mouth, they decide not to but threaten that they’ll get even with her if she makes a sound.  Amanda wants to leave Julia in a construction area that is “forbidden without a teacher” as they round a corner, another 5th grader, Sabrina, comes along.  Sabrina sees that Julia looks distressed and says, “Hey, what are you doing?” Amanda tells Sabrina “mind your own business” but Sabrina sees Julia bound hands, “Julia, are you OK?”  Penny grabs Sabrina, but Sabrina struggles distracting Amanda and Penny.  Sabrina yells “Run Julia! Go get help!”  Julia runs to her classroom and Sabrina breaks free from Amanda’s grip.  Sabrina and Julia tell their teacher.  The school administrators hear from the two sets of girls and suspend Amanda and Penny for two days and require them to write an essay reflecting on their actions.  A week later, the school sends a letter to the parents indicating that two older girls had tied the hands of a younger student and then untied them and that the school had managed the situation. Julia’s parents are extremely distressed after hearing about this event from their daughter; they feel that more should be done to punish the older girls, but they feared if they stand up on behalf of their daughter, it would be their daughter who would suffer the consequences from the school. Julia’s parents are hard working public servants; they are comfortable but not wealthy. Amanda’s parents are very wealthy, have donated a lot of money to the school, and are leaders of a fundraising campaign for the school.  During her suspension, Amanda’s mother took her shopping for the afternoon.  The parents of the girls involved meet with school administrators and the matter is deemed resolved, but what about the community? I hear about this event while visiting with a friend and his daughter, Beth, a classmate of Julia’s; after her father relayed the story, Beth looked at him and said “Daddy, I’m scared.”  There was no attention to fully healing the entire community, rather the interest was to quickly, quietly resolve the situation, but at what cost?  If a school has the best teachers and a state-of-the-art campus, yet students are terrified within the environment, will they be able to learn? Is this merely, ‘kids being kids’ or is this a manifestation of other systemic issues? Does it matter that there are numerous power imbalances between Amanda/Penny and Julia/Sabrina –Amanda and Penny are older, larger, wealthy, and Caucasian- while Julia and Sabrina are younger, smaller, working class, and of Asian/Latino descent?  How does a school equip a new generation with tools – skills and capacity- to build a brighter, inclusive future?  How can adults – parents, teachers, community members – offer guidance to young people in this situation and demonstrate living together well, not condoning bullying and oppression? What is a just response that breaks the cycle of violence, offers healing for everyone, and transforms the situation to reclaim wholeness for the individuals and the community?

In applying the Passive Participant in Conflict (PPiC) framework to this scenario, we will focus primarily on the conflict as it arises out of the age differences[2] while noting additional layers of power imbalance that may contribute to the experience of conflict for the participants.

All the 8th graders (13 year olds) become members of a collective oppressor group.  Even though all have not ‘acted,’ their power relationship to the actors and victims makes them passive participants to this conflict.  There are several perspectives that these 8th grade students might hold.  Some might not see a problem at all.  Some might not agree with the behavior of the two girls, but do not see themselves as involved.  Others might not agree with the girls conduct, and might choose to act in a protective way toward the younger students.

The 7th graders (12 year olds) become passive participants to this conflict.  Although the 7th graders may feel intimidated by the power of 8th graders, they have two grades of students below them who may be deferring to their power as they are much like 8th graders to these younger children.  This group is likely to be unaware of their power role, since they are acutely aware of the power of those older than they are.  When the 7th graders become 8th graders, they would likely be hurt and confused if younger students were scared of them, because they didn’t “do” anything. If the school adopted a strict policy on this kind of conduct the following year,  this group might feel resentful that they are being ‘punished’ for a wrong that they did not commit.  Next year, when this group become 8th graders, their use of power may be influenced by their experience of having been involved, albeit passively, in this conflict.  Though one might believe that simply having experienced being oppressed provides enough guidance for people to learn to use their power well, history suggests that modeling is a powerful teacher; thus, until the injuries under power abuse are healed and one learns to use one’s power consciously, change is not likely to happen.

The 6th graders (11 year olds) also become passive participants to this conflict.

The 6th graders have a dominant power role related to the 5th graders.  Though with two grades above them, they are likely to identify more with the 5th graders and the experience of being ‘under’ others’ power, and one might expect the 6th graders to “do” more to support the younger students, perhaps making an effort to develop friendships across grades and looking out for younger girls; as a group, they are likely to actively promote equity and safety within the community.

The 5th graders (10 year olds), share a common characteristic with the victim, and thus, are all passive participants to the conflict.  They have three grades of power holders above them.  After an incident like this, some might be expected to hold a global sense of fear, such as that expressed by Beth, who now has a fear at school.  Others might identify with the targeted child differently and experience something akin to survivors’ guilt—a sense that “it could have been me”.

The school administrators and teachers are also passive participants in this conflict.  As people who are older and in power, they are by default most closely aligned with the 8th graders in this situation.  However, as adults and administrators, they hold power to determine how to handle the 8th graders and the how to manage the entire school community.  They punished the two students who acted out by suspending them from school, and they responded to the parents of children directly involved with a meeting to facilitate understanding of the situation.  In one sense, the administrators are bystanders to the conflict between the girls; yet with a connection to this event, they are also participants and how they choose to intercede reflects how they model using their power. 

Within the adult community, there are additional layers of power related to position and wealth.  As private school administrators and teachers, the school’s faculty work for the parents.  They have an obligation to realize the school’s academic mission and to maintain the school’s fiscal health. As such, these administrators have authority over the children, yet they remain accountable to the parents[3].  In the adult landscape of power that considers position and wealth, one might recognize similar power positions analogous to the grades of student.



[1] I recently attended a powerful presentation to mediators on power imbalances related to age by Phyllis Beck Kitrek, author of Negotiating at an Uneven Table.  The speaker skillfully demonstrated to the dominant group in the room (largest, loudest, wealthiest aka Baby Boomers) that they were blind to their power, their behavior, their impact, and how this blindness was potentially detrimental to their capacity to harness their real power as they enter into the era of ‘elders’ – a role where transmission of power, wisdom, and resources onto the next generation is crucial for society’s benefit.  A baby boomer from the group stated that she felt like a fish swimming in water not having recognized her power.  For those who find themselves in a ‘group’ that suffers from the inability to cultivate an inclusive space, whether across generational, socio-economic, ethnicity or other group-based identities, I hope the frameworks of PPiC, Mind the Gaps and I + U HALT Injustice provide tools to realize inclusiveness in your endeavors. Mind the Gaps and I+U HALT Injustice available from the author: [email protected]

[2] This is a fictional narrative for teaching any resemblance to a true story is purely coincidental.

[3] This relationship is peculiar to private school environments, but analogous to a variety of other situations, so I chose to make this “hypothetical case study” in a private school.
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5<5: Self-designed Education: Sustainable Leadership: Ethics & Conflict Resolution

1/6/2007

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Picture
This post is one in a series of 5<5 posts that document pilot/prototype projects with the format 5 things that I wish someone had told me before I started in <5% of the time spent on the project.  This post provides context around the project, since it was a cornerstone project for me in 2005-2007. 

In 2005, I graduated from Cardozo Law School with a certificate in Bioethics and Medical Humanities and a certificate in Alternative Dispute Resolution.  I wanted to work in clinical ethics using the approach of Bioethics Mediation as was used by Nancy Dubler at Montefiore Medical Center where I did an internship during law school.  I taught my first course in bioethics at the New School University in the summer of 2005.  

Then I embarked on a two year self-designed Masters/Fellowship in sustainable leadership, ethics and conflict resolution.  No programs offered what I wanted. I considered a traditional MA program in conflict resolution or a fellowship in clinical ethics, but each had parts but not all of what I wanted, so I decided to save money and design my own learning program.  

In many professions, training is ill-suited to the actual work that they one does. Thrust into positions of responsibility for which they are ill-prepared, people cope by scrambling to prove themselves, they often hide their stress and fears in addiction, and many spend their professional lives running from the shadow of incompetence until they catch their equilibrium years, maybe decades later. None of my mentors thought that I needed further training, but I did and I began when I felt ready.  Not because I lack confidence, rather because I wanted to show up differently.

5 Things I wish someone had told me before I started this project:


1. Be aware that the world does not understand self-designed.  Make the decision to self-design with the awareness that getting what you want and need because you designed the education yourself may come with the cost that others may not recognize and value the work that you did because it was not "contained" within a formally recognized setting and format.  We remain in a time of transition, some areas embrace alternatives more readily than others.  Think very carefully about this decision, especially if you want to work in a traditional field.

2. Money still factors in.  While I did not enroll in a 2 year MA program that might have cost $30k + living expenses.  I still had living expenses and the costs of multiple workshops, trainings, travel to get to courses.  Today, I am enrolled in 4 courses via the internet but 6-7 years ago that was not possible.  Alternative curriculum design may become more accessible with these kinds of courses being more accessible (for now free, we'll see how long that lasts).  Not being in a traditional structure means that you can't access student loans.  So kickstarter/indi-go-go/ start up you/ student funder are all options; like internships, self-designed alternative education remains limited to those with the privilege of a cushion of support.

3. Develop a documenting strategy at the outset. It may get modified but begin with a vision for how to share what you've learned and what you want to show as the learning at the end.  I wrote about the need for better tools to support self-designed learning in this post: Learning Journey Tools Requested  
  • The best strategy that I heard about was for a self-designed PhD.  In collaboration with a mentor: you identify 8 core topics that are the foundation for the thesis, then you teach on those core topics to demonstrate that you learned them.  Then you have 3 areas for in depth study and you agree on how you will show the mentor that you have mastered these areas.  Finally, you write and defend the dissertation.  This can be modified for a lower level of study.

4. Creating a self-designed course of learning builds an unique life skill of self-directed learner.  Most people go to school, and schools say what courses are available, what you have to take to qualify for your major, school ensures lots of other people around doing the same thing you are, and school determines the exam schedule to demonstrate success.  A self-designed education requires:
  •  the self-knowledge to know what you know and what you don't know
  • the curiosity to determine what you need to learn
  • the resourcefulness to seek alternative venues to find places to gain that knowledge/experience
  • the creativity to access those learning opportunities
  • the motivation to keep going when you are on your own at every juncture
  • the perseverance to keep going when things are tough; no flow/current carries you other than your own conviction 
  • the courage to share your learnings for public scrutiny.  Unlike in school, the public can be a tougher critic than a professor for a test and comments are public and permanent. 
The upside is that life, which increasingly requires learning new skills all the time, will be much easier to navigate because you will know how to update your skills regularly rather than waiting for someone else to organize it for you. 

5.  Identify mentors and check in with them consistently about your progress.  Mentors were invaluable as people with whom I could reflect on my learning and experiences and check in as I planned next steps.  Find the people that you want to grow up to "be like" (p.s. age is irrelevant).   I have learned that people whom I want to emulate often are not able to tell me what I need to do/learn, because they operate with "unconscious competence."  But I studied what they did in order to learn those skills or find people with whom I could learn them, and often reflecting that kind of learning back to them helps them see their gifts; mentoring is a symbiotic relationship.



Learning goals: 

Conflict Resolution
  • to deepen my skills as a mediator in order to be 'prepared' for high stakes/life-death related mediations in the hospital
  • to make peace within myself so that I would be an invisible party in the room
  • to cultivate the capacity to be aware of my influence and not add noise/bias to the conflicts that I mediated

Sustainable Leadership
  • to develop the capacity to be present with suffering and conflict without 'burning out'
  • to build my leadership capacity to lead change sustainably
  • to cultivate the capacity to lead inclusively 

Ethics
  • to develop a coherent personal framework to ground my ethics work
  • to study the science of decision making and influence and how it applies in ethics and mediation
  • to design a community health ethic 

Curriculum included: (partial list, not complete)

Basics Mediation Training, Steven Rosenberg
Basics Mediation Training, Community Boards
Advanced Mediation Training, Steven Rosenberg
Small Claims Court Mediation Training, San Francisco
Elder Mediation Training, ARMS
Mediation for Community Boars, Office of Citizen Complaints, San Francisco Civil Court: Small Claims Court
Non-Violent Communication
     NVC Bay Area with Marshall Rosenberg
     NVC on Diversity: Race, Class, Gender
Facing Violence World Forum: Conflict Resolution, Ethics & Justice
     Workshops with Public Conversations, Search for Common Ground, Facing History, Facing Ourselves, Angeles Arrien
Healing the Wounds of War on All Sides, Vietnam Tour with Thich Nhat Hanh
     5 week daily practice, 3 3-day long ceremonies in Hanoi, Hue, and Ho Chi Minh City, multiple retreats

Meditation Course, Green Gulch Farm
7 Day Silent Retreat, Green Gulch Farm
Retreat for People of Color, Deer Park Monastery
Retreat for People of Color and Vietnamese-Speaking Community, Deer Park Monastery
People of Color practice group

Study on the way of the Bodhisattva, SFZC
Study of the Lotus Sutra, Green Gulch Farm
Study of 5 Precepts across tradition, Green Gulch study group
Study of 14 Mindfulness Trainings of Plum Village tradition

Learnings

I have not entirely determined an effective way to share what I learned.  In part because much of it was deeply personal to me and that might not be as relevant to others.  I endeavored in 2008 to write some frameworks and methods that endeavored to share my learnings.  These are the beginning and there remains more to share.  Hopefully, in time, the medium or means will present themselves. 

Passive Participation in Conflict
  • A framework for recognizing the legacy of injustice on all sides and strategies for healing those experiences to cultivate peace at the base of one's activities.

Mind the Gaps 
  • A method for innovative, inclusive problem solving.  A primer on human-centered design, human factors and latent need finding to make solutions inclusive for diverse communities.

I + U Halt Injustice 
  • A framework for identifying the areas of capacity needed to support inclusive problem solving

Elder Ethics
  • A virtual journal club to examine cases regarding care for older adults in the community setting

Clinical Ethics Consultation: A Mediator's Toolbox
  • A primer that induces mediation tools applied to clinical ethics 

Mediating the Holidays
  • A workshop on cultivating cultural humility to navigate the differences one encounters in all domains of life
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    part of Kate's Mural

    idea incubator & 
    prototype lab 
     . . . architecting hope . . .  


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